Staying Vulnerable

Those are words that few people truly want to face. Breaking down the wall between inner thoughts and outer reflections is never the most comfortable place. But in an attempt to communicate a character or a poem or a thought within music "staying vulnerable" is required. In doing so, singers also have to find a way to put emotions on display and then have them critiqued; by teachers, and coaches, and fellow singers, and nonmusicians. (And unfortunately, for those who chose to display in such a public manner, my the youtube population.)

Don't worry- I'm not about to launch into a breakdown. Quite the opposite!

Today, after two german courses, a french diction coaching, a practice session, lunch (for which we trecked through the pouring rain), a rehearsal for a spanish songs concert I'll be singing in, and a coaching... I had a breakthrough.

In the last five minutes of Stage Artistry I sang the recitative section of "Deh Vieni Non Tardar" and was asked about my posture. Now, in singing this usually leads to a long discussion about Alexander Technique or an explanation of alignment, but today, I was asked to stop fixing my posture; to just sing. And I got goosebumps. But then they'll see into my soul! Into my deep, dark soul! (laugh here.)

All of a sudden the gestures and movements which I had been using to communicate my inner thoughts were no longer necessary. Now I could feel my classmates go on Susannah's journey with me as opposed to telling them about Susannah's journey.

Cool, cool. So this happens in a matter of minutes and I have to run up to my Voice Studio class. And what did I hear? "It seems like your subtext- which is beautiful throughout the introduction- stops the moment before you're about to sing. DON"T DO THAT." But then they'll see into my thoughts! my mean, critical thoughts! (Wrong.)

Now my thoughts could only be those of Susannah's and the only words which could convey those thoughts were in the text.

So simple, and yet so incredibly difficult. The trouble with this work is that when I allowed the wall to drop, my diction went out the door. As my father would say; everything in moderation.

In other news, I went to see the castle ruins in Gosting with Natalie on Sunday. We climbed to the top of a mountain (while listen to a man in the valley sing "Country Road Lead Me Home" with his accordain for a town festival) and then to the top of the castly tower for a beautiful view of Graz (at top).

The trail to the castle.